Finding Myself Again

So I finally decided it is time to get a freakin' move on with my life. I am done wishing I had someone, particularity a certain someone. Bleh!

I really think this weekend is the first time I have actually enjoyed sex since M.D.
Now I don't know if I like Bee enough to be her girlfriend but I do know that this is a start to moving on!

Speaking of moving on I am so excited for my voucher to come in. Ah I cant wait to move into my own place! I know that it will be a little shabby and mostly empty but at least it is mine!

School is draining me. I know that this is what I want to do but I cant help feeling a little overwhelmed knowing that in a few short years I can take my C.E.C and start actually working as an executive chef. I feel so young and I am fully aware that my age is going to drastically effect my working options. Its funny that even of you are really talented in a specific area, if that area is predominately older males it is extremely hard for a young person, not to mention a woman to break into that profession.

I feel in limbo right now. I am stuck in between stages romantically, personally and professionally. Maybe this what being twenty is all about. I am too old to be a teenager but too young to really be considered an adult.

Strange how life works out.

Regardless of this limbo stage I am happy. I happy I am finally moving on. I am happy to just being able to spend a day alone and not feel sad or angry. I am happy to enjoy sex and great conversations with a romantic interest. I happy to finally feel something for someone even if it is a little ambiguous. I am finally being a whole, confident person again.

So here is to me, my life, and moving on.

Nena