A.S was on the phone calling for D.D and she ended up calling the wrong hotel room and some creepy ass man picks up the phone and A.S is like "Hello is D. there?" and the man is like "D.? No...I don't know any D. When did D. check into this room? I just checked in yesterday." then A.S is like "Well...umm..." then the man was like "So whats your name?" and stupid A.S says "A." he is like "Well hello there A. I am Martin" So I say to A.S "Hello there little girl" And she finally get the picture that she should not be talking to this creep and she is like " I have to go" and he is like "No,no" and A.S hangs up on him. I am like "Jeez A. you should not be talking to creeps" and she kind of laughs. So we get on the bus and half way through the ride A.S is like "We should totally call that creep back and just say weird stuff" I knew that she would never do it so I am like "O.K give me your phone" and she kind of looks at me all surprised. P. moves closer to me and is like "Man, I wanna hear this."
I wait as the phone rings, laughing , totally not believing that I am doing this and wondering if I can keep a straight face as I talk to him. The hotel clerk picks up the phone and I ask if I can be transferred to room 207 and I wait form him to transfer me. I feel like hanging up the phone but P. and A.S are sitting next to all anxious like (peer pressure card) Gosh I am such a typical teenager.
here is the conversation:
ME: "Well hello there big boy" (P. suppressing giggles in the background, oh by the way I am using what P. calls my seductress voice ~rolls eyes~)
Him: "Why hello there, what are you up to?" (notice no hesitation or "who the hell is this)
ME: "Oh a little something"
HIM: "A little something aye what might that something be?"
ME: (thinking frantically of something to say) "Oh, just a little something, and you?"
HIM: "Just a little work here and there, gotta make some money"
ME: " Oh (laughs fakely but "Sexyly") money you say"
NOTICE: he hasn't even asked what my name is yet
HIM: "So where might your coordinates be?"
ME: (raises and eyebrow thinking "coordinates? really? He just said coordinates?") "Your heart baby" (trying to be equally as cheezy)
HIM: "Oh I like that answer"
ME: "Oh do you now?" (rolls my eyes)
HIM: "So, whats your name?"
ME: (so now he asks) (hesitates trying desperately to think of a name) "Sarah, and yours big boy?"
(P. and A.S are laugh so hard by this point but quietly mind you as to not disturb the creepy guy)
HIM: "Miles (notice its a different name from what he gave A.S)"
ME: "Hmmm...Miles..."
Being totally grossed out with myself and creepy I hang up saying to A.S and P. "God, I can't do it anymore"
I can't stop laughing though.
So after getting off the bus P., A.S and I all walk down to the thrift store and look around finding what we like there we go out to eat at this burger joint then hit another thrift store at the other side of the Burger joint.
A.S and I are sitting on a sofa in the thrift store when this really tall creepy old man walks by and says "Oh god, do I really have to walk past you two?"
A.S and I are really confused and so he continues "You are so cute" pointedly looking at A.S. I just blurt out before I can stop myself "Yeah, so is jail" (I personally think that this is the most genius thing I have said all day) He kind of laughs and A.S hits me and he is like "Man, I was just trying to give you a complement and you go and say something like that" He is way to close for comfort and I have an urge to kick him but I don't. He looks into the shopping cart in front of use and says "This is interesting" he bends over and reads the title of the book that is lying in the shopping cart which is something to do with dreams and fantasies coming true and he looks at me and says "Maybe I should just keep my fantasies in my head" and what I should have said was "Yeah maybe you should" But instead I kept my mouth shut and glared at him.
The teller at the bank noticed my ring that my dad gave me for Christmas and she got all excited (which was really cute because she was really old and frail looking wear a really bright blue business jacket and that big gaudy jewelry that old people are so fond of) and she says tome "Oh, are you engaged?" I kind of blush and say "Yes"
and she says "Oh dear congratulations, whens the date?" I am like "Oh it wont be for a couple of years but on May third" and she asks why may third and I say that it is a significant date to my other and she just looks all overjoyed and happy that I can't help but smile.
If my day was not weird enough some old lady started talking to me about how she was twenty seven and in high school and now that she is fifty something she is in college and I sit and nod politely but I really don't care but at the same time I don't want to be rude. She then starts telling me how her dad thinks she is as big as a house and she shows me a picture that looks like it was cut out of a magazine and says that that was her when she was younger and I say that she is still beautiful and she says thanks and tells me that I am a lot nicer then the rest of the people here on earth. I am kind of weirded out so I say excuse me but my friend A.S wants to talk to me and fortunately A.S was sitting at the back of the bus and the older woman stayed were she was.
Yup that was my weird day.
I had fun though.
Cheetah Cheetah Nude Nude meow!!! (this is because P. and I found a cheetah print lingerie top with black feather fuzz around the top and P. told me I should wear it for M.D and I was like yeah so she could choke on the feathers and die in the middle of amazing sex "Cheetah Cheetah nude nude cough cough choke die" then when we went to the other thrift store we found some boots that were cheetah fur like snake skin boots but pseudo cheetah fur boots and P. was like Nena you should totally get this for your Cheetah Cheetah Nude Nude show for M.D along with that top. And I was like great now I will die too while standing in those damn things.)
Lol
Nena
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