Pros and Cons

Its weird I have been waiting for a year to have my baby sister back again and now that I do the joy of it all it not what I thought it would be. I meant it is nice and all but now I just feel as though I am more stuck then I was before. I sent A. Some web sites on becoming a foster parent and she wrote back saying she had to get in gear if she wanted me for part of the summer. It made me laugh, because I know she means it but then again she does not have to be a foster parent in order for me to have visitation. Speaking of which my social worker made me laugh my ass off the other day we were having he conversation that we normally have, school ....So on and so forth but then I brought up the subject of visiting A. During the summer and she was like "oh yeah it would be nice if I could meet her first" I nearly choked on my sprite, I am astounded if she thinks that a trip from Ohio to san Diego is financually easy if so then she is truly insane, talking to her on the phone ....Fine but A. Coming all the way out here just to sit and have a "nice" lunch with my crack-pot social worker well that is entirely another story. Wow ~wipes tear from eye~ sometimes people are just so stupid its funny.

my sister came today she now lives in this beautiful place ~rolls eyes~ I told her not to come that she would not like it but noooooo she insisted that she wanted to be here to be with me!!!!!! fuck what is it going to be like if I leave here???? I don't know!!!!!!


I really want to go live with A., for one it would an opportunity that I don't see me getting again. It would be another chance at being happy, and most of all I would be surrounded with people that I know truly care..... And now for the cons...I would have to leave patches and my sister....I don't mind so much leaving the rest of my family just them two. I mind leaving them because I know I help them both and without me there what will become of my beloved little family?

I have much more pros then I do cons but that one con is something to be considered with great care.

I should be getting home I am waiting for a phone call from A.

I wonder do my calls rack up her phone bill???? LOL I hope not

forever
nena